Tribute

Elbert's favorite room in our house was the sunroom. It had lots of windows and he could sit and watch people walking by and cars going over the speed limit. He'd say every time 'they sure are going fast'. Of course, to him by that time everything was going faster than he could comprehend.

As I needed to be with him more and more, I moved my computer desk into the sunroom so I could have something to do while I sat with him. Conversation was almost non-existent and I just don't SIT very well without something to do.

About a month ago I walked into the living room. I had placed his folded flag on the mantel in there and I just had this feeling that Elbert needed to be in that sunroom he loved so much. So, I got one of this old Navy hats, the large picture of him we used for the viewing at the funeral home, his flag and one of his hunting horns. And, I placed them on top of my desk. I can look up anytime I wish and see his handsome face looking down on me. Dd Shirley asked me if that didn't make me cry. Usually not, I told her. But, if I cry, that's alright. I feel his presence with me and that is comforting.

Tieing up loose ends

I am finding that there are a lot of 'loose' ends that has to be taken care of. Paperwork, paperwork. For everyone I am sure it is different... Paperwork after death has to do with whatever your life involved around.

Once my brain started functioning on a somewhat normal level (after the funeral and the new experiences of being alone) I started on in that blasted PAPERWORK... I am a pretty independent person and I have been so determined to take care of things myself. But, do you know there were letters I received... and read....and forms to fill out that I lay aside saying I need a clearer mind to tackle that.

One was the nursing home final bill. It just didn't seem right to me so I drove down yesterday to see if I could find out what was wrong. Seems that one insurance we had wouldn't cover skilled care so they had billed me for it... BUT... the business office didn't have another insurance listed that Elbert had. Once that was figured into the equation I only owed them half what they said I did. I was so excited that I had handled that and with good results. In fact, I was so excited I drove over to my favorite sandwich shop and treated myself to their extra yummy chicken salad sandwich on croisant. Oh, my.

I can't believe that it is March already. Some small signs of spring, like my daffodils blooming, grass getting greener and the days a bit warmer some of the time. I was just thinking about a day trip Elbert and I took in 2001 a couple years after we moved to Va.  We had never been to Jamestown so we decided we would go. I mean, we were so close and to not see it seemed a real shame.

Elbert was such a people person. He never met a stranger, would talk to anyone and most times have them loving his stories and jokes. So, he naturally wanted his picture made with one of the Jamestown Settlement interpreter. Can't remember for sure but from the big smiles on both their faces I can just about guarantee that Elbert has just told her something funny.

Being a sailor and having served on several of our Naval ships he really was amazed at how tiny the Susan Constant was. He crawled around all over it.

And, then he 'pretended' to steer her to America.

I have been so blessed to have had Elbert for such a long time. He was always charming, fun and loved life to the enth degree.

Cool Memories

As I was driving to the nursing home yesterday my mind wandered back to other long ago Fall days when the air was crisp and the sun was lemon yellow. I recalled a special time with my Mother, who has been gone since 1996. Elbert loved my Mom and the feeling was mutual. She lived across the driveway from us in her mobile home (so I could keep an eye on her) and Elbert looked after her just like I did.

It was cool that day, the leaves had turned and Elbert knew that Mom would enjoy a brief trip down to the pasture. The grazing land was edged with maple, oak, dogwood, sourwood, everything to make some beautiful colors that time of the year.

'Let's take your Mom for a spin'. he said

So, we put her in the truck, he opened the pasture gate and away we went, bumpy, bumpy. The cows were used to him feeding them hay from the back of the truck so naturally they all came running. Elbert rode as close to the trees as he could and then he took off across the pasture. He knew where a persimmon tree was

and since we'd had a frost the persimmons ought to be good and sweet. Mom was delighted to see the heavily loaded tree and she got out and ate just about as many as a possum would!!

That's just the sweet, kind-hearted kind of man Elbert was. Special times indeed. I don't see that side of his personality now. He's struggling to stay Elbert but it sure is hard. Yesterday, he was very unfocused. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

Gee, I wonder if that persimmon tree is still down in what used to be our pasture?

Days Past

It's years and years and years since the Korean War. To think about that makes me feel so old. To tell the truth Elbert and I are in our sunset years. Back then we were young and foolish and in love.......and apart. 

Elbert was a radioman aboard a ship 

and it was his job (along with the other radiomen) to take and receive messages in teletype or morse code. 

Sometimes the guys took a break

(look at the mustache on that handsome face. Only time he ever grew one)

And once Elbert got caught napping. (he wasn't on duty so he didn't get in trouble)

Until recently that man could still send morse code messages.... dit, dit, dot, dit. Even with his mind wrapped tightly with Alzheimers he remembered those codes. How strangely the brain gets tangled, all twisted and warped and then suddenly a light flickers for just a moment.... and his hand goes out to touch the key again  dit, dit, dot, dit. 

Whistle a Happy Tune

The other day when I was posting about Elbert whistling all the time I knew that I did not have a picture of him in the act. But, lo and behold, while I was scanning some photos for daughter Shirley I found one. Just had to share. This was taken at our 50th wedding anniversary celebration.... Shirley was dancing with her Dad while he whistled the tune to her. Precious memories. 

Whistle a Happy Tune

Did you ever turn on the tv and hear Andy Griffith whistling as he and Opie headed down to the fishing hole? You can still see those programs on one of the cable channels. Sometimes when I am sitting with Elbert I turn it on just to recall happier times. 

After Elbert retired from his job teaching in 1990 he took up the habit of whistling everywhere he went. He was just such a happy person, always satisfied with what life had to dish out and he expressed that by whistling. I knew the minute he walked in the back door. I could hear his whistling before I heard the door creak open. It was such a joyful sound. 

Then, one day the whistling stopped. He seems to have forgotten how to purse his lips to make a tune come out. Or perhaps he has forgotten the tunes altogether. Our world we live in is silent now and I miss that whistling husband a whole bunch.